Driving With a Baby.
When I write about Ollie my general attitude is, I’m chilled out and don’t get stressed out by being a mom. I know some people find this annoying and think I’m faking it. I’m not. I don’t find it difficult having a baby. I’m not going to feel guilty about that because some people find it hard. As I’ve said before, we can’t sensitise everything we post just incase somebody is offended. I find it difficult to put my head under water but I wouldn’t be pissed off if somebody posted holiday photos of them swimming underwater just because I find it stressful.
Anyway, criticising somebody’s ability to cope with a situation doesn’t lessen that persons ability and doesn’t increase your ability to cope so it really is quite pointless to pay so much attention to each other’s varying abilities to cope with various situations.
Today I’m going to share a little secret about an aspect of motherhood that I don’t like. Are your ready… I HATE driving with Ollie in the car. I don’t mind being in the car with Ollie if Dave is driving or if my sister or somebody is with me. I hate it when it’s just us.
When he makes a noise, my instinct is to turn my head to him even if it’s just a cough, all of my instincts want to check he’s ok. Obviously, turning your head in the opposite direction is not ideal for driving. Yes you can get these mirrors but then driving and constantly staring in a mirror isn’t ideal either. So I really don’t like driving with Ollie in the car! The furthest I’ve driven is to Merry Hill from Kings Norton, it’s only 40 minutes but the only places I regularly drive with him is baby swimming which is 20 minutes, town (city centre for the non Brummies) which is 15 minutes or my moms which is only 5 minutes. That’s about it!
If he cries and I’m driving that’s even worse! All I want to do is instantly pull over but that’s not always an option. One time he cried and I was trapped in traffic with no where to stop or pull over! I hated it. Babies cry to communicate a and I hate ignoring him when he’s trying to talk to me! If your toddler was sitting in the back saying, “Mommy I need a wee.” You wouldn’t just ignore them so I hate ignoring Ollie. I do talk to him but he can’t see me so I don’t like it. If Dave is driving, not a problem. I’ll jump over into the back if he’s sad! Luckily, on long journeys Ollie does tend to just sleep but I wouldn’t chance driving down the motorway with him.
Should I Display a Baby on Board Sign?
When Ollie was born I was actually quite excited about being able to display my little sign. I thought that this would potentially make some drivers more patient with me. When I’m on my own I’m quite ballsy, I will pull out as soon as there’s a gap on a roundabout and I’ll pull out of a side road halfway and everyone can just wait until someone gives way on the other half.
When I’ve got Ollie, I won’t take any chances. I wait until it’s clear. I don’t care if somebody is beeping at me or swearing to themselves. I’d rather wait a minute or five minutes than chance it and misjudge and have someone go into me with Ollie in the back. I’d never forgive myself. I know it sounds stupid, like I’m willing to crash on my own, I’m not. I’m still sensible on my own but I’m over sensible with Ollie.
I thought that displaying the sign might make other drivers realise why I’m more cautious or hesitant on the road. Then I read that having these signs can make you a target for insurance scams. If somebody performed a scam of any kind causing a minor collision, any mom would instantly check on their baby. You would not be concerned about the state of your car or details that could prove its a scam or the description of the car and driver. You’d instantly check on your baby! Or it can make you a target for thieves, it can be translated to “hey I have a designer pram in my boot!”
For these reasons, I haven’t been displaying my little sign.
Then I saw some advice from the emergency services stating that you should always display the sign because it makes the emergency services aware that there is a little person inside that cannot get themselves out. So if they arrive at a horrible accident scene and you’re in no state to say, “Rescue my baby!” They will be aware that there is a baby in there. I’ll take my chances of getting scammed and put my sign up!
It’s a horrible thought to have and I’d like to think my driving is sensible enough to not end up in an awful worst case scenario situation but I think that’s a good enough reason to display the sign! Make sure you take the sign down if you don’t have your baby with you.
So there you go, I’m not chilled out about everything! I hate driving with Ollie. I could make this longer and write about isofix car seats and why I don’t think we need mother and baby spaces but I’ll save it for another blog!