Oliver’s Diary: Locked Out! 

My Momma is really annoying me. One time when I first learnt how to stand up, I fell over on the stupid hard floor. Yeh ok it did hurt but it was just one time and I’m not scared. I’ve been walking for absolutely ages now, I know what to do.

I’m only allowed in the living room with the soft floor. I’m not allowed in the dining room or kitchen. Well, I am allowed in but not on my own only if Momma is there. She’s so stupid, the floor is still hard just because she’s there it doesn’t turn soft. Stupid momma!

It’s really annoying because I know where the treats are, in the draw in the kitchen so if I can escape through the stupid gate before she looks I can quickly get a biscuit but she keeps catching me.

Daddy started this new thing, letting me in the dining room but shutting the kitchen door. Ok thanks dad, now I can crawl under the table which is fun and like a den but… What about the treats?


Just let me in! I’m not going to be stupid and touch the oven, everybody knows that’s too hot and I’m not going to drink that smelly drink that Momma puts in the washing machine for the clothes. I admit I do like pressing the buttons on the washing machine but it’s not a big deal when Momma does it so why can’t I?

Parents are so annoying sometimes!

  • Tori Gabriel

    Ha ha, love this. Poor deprived Ollie! Keep trying for those biscuits. X